Yes. I know this for sure. Life is not about meeting nice guys, but about finding the right guys. (By guys here I mean people in general; male and female both included). So many times what happens is that we come across nice human beings who are just nice, decent people. But you don’t want them, there is something about them that turns you off. Or maybe at that certain point of time you dislike them. Maybe they can be great drinking buddies for you but not great colleagues. Maybe they can be your perfect spouse but not your best friend. Maybe they can be no one to you yet you can share a great human relationship or bonding with them.
In my opinion one should ask two basic questions to ensure that you find the right person for the right task.
1. What exactly do you wanna do?
You don’t take a stud to a comic convention and a nerd to a bar in order to pick up chicks. You don’t look for a fun guy to get your serious work done. You don’t hire a hitman to take your dog out for a walk. I think the task / job / role is the most important aspect to be kept in mind.
2. How many things are common between the ideal person you are looking for and the actual person?
This is where people make bad choices. One reason is sometimes people settle down too easily, in other words, they compromise. Having said that, finding the right people is tough. But for the most of the people there is no ideal picture or it is too ‘Cinderella Story ideal’. But in my view if you can cross off more than 8-10 similarities don’t let that person go. If you have around 5 similarities there’s scope. Less than that and you are wasting time.
Hopefully, this formula is somewhat successful, not to find people, but to eliminate superfluous options.